June 13, 2018

The threat of a Canadian invasion

Sam Smith - While I know many believe Donald Trump is using the national security excuse merely to find a legal justification for raising tariffs against Canada, readers need to  understand that the Progressive Review comes to you only slightly above two hundred miles from the Canadian border. That's close enough that the Canadians could easily wipe out this village even without denuclearization which I assume Trump will soon demand. And it will certainly will become harder to get cheaper prescription drugs from your remaining Canadian pals. So we will be following this threat in coming months  at least until Trump, after a summit with the Canadian prime minister, declares Trudeau almost as outstanding as Kim Jong-un.

Federation of American Scientist Secrecy News With exquisitely strange timing, the Department of Homeland Security today unveiled a "Northern Border Strategy" to protect the United States against threats originating in Canada.

The new Trump Administration
strategy acknowledges that "the Northern Border remains an area of limited threat in comparison to the U.S. Southern Border."

"However," it goes on to say, "the Northern Border is not without safety, security, and resiliency challenges.  The most common threat to U.S. public safety along the Northern Border continues to be the bi-directional flow of illicit drugs."

The strategy also warns of "homegrown violent extremists in Canada who are not included in the U.S. Government's consolidated terrorist watch list and could therefore enter the United States legally."

The case for invading AmericaScott Gilmore, McLeans, Canada -

Future historians will never be able to claim we didn’t try. As Foreign Minister Chrystia Freeland said at the end of the recent disastrous G7 summit (and while carefully avoiding the present tense) Canada is “the closest and strongest ally the United States has had.”

And it has not been easy; a more belligerent, loud and difficult neighbor would be hard to find. But we have remained unfailingly calm, helpful and even polite. We were there to accept their wayward American aircraft after 9/11. We fought and died beside them in Europe, Korea and Afghanistan. For decades, we’ve shared our intelligence, our maple syrup and our comedians. And in return we graciously took their draft dodgers, reality TV shows and light beer with nary a complaint.

Unfortunately, those days are past. Relations between Washington and Ottawa (and Mexico City, and Berlin, and London, and Paris, and Canberra, and Tokyo, and Seoul, and almost everywhere else except Moscow) have reached rock bottom.

Every effort has been made, through multilateral channels, bilateral visits, shuttle diplomacy and Broadway musicals to find a way out of this festering crisis. But none of these strategies have worked and we are now left with only one option: invade the United States in order to restore order and stability.

The case for military action is obvious, but nonetheless it deserves reviewing. First, America has become a failed state. The decades-long internecine conflict between the two main cultural factions, Republicans and Democrats, has led to the collapse of their political institutions. Laws cannot be passed. Ambassadors cannot be appointed. Even basic health care cannot be provided to all its citizens.

Corruption has reached third world levels. Congressmen and Senators spend so much time and effort collecting bribes (referred to as “campaign donations” in their local dialect) that they no longer have time to debate policy or legislation. Even the president has left himself wide open to allegations he is on the take, negotiating lucrative real estate deals for himself while he appoints family members to positions of power and influence.

As with other failed states, the United States is no longer able to control its own borders. Drugs and guns flow over their southern frontier and asylum seekers flee over their northern frontier. Due to an unchecked arms trade there are now more firearms in the United States than in Afghanistan, Iraq, Somalia, Yemen and Syria combined. This has led to unbridled violence which has made many areas of the country “no go zones.” (The murder rate is twice Europe’s.)

The President himself has declared Afghanistan is safer than Chicago. Sadly, this also means the American government is not even able to protect schools, which now endure mass shootings on a nearly weekly basis.



Anonymous said...

Blame Canada.

Anonymous said...

"Mass shootings on a nearly weekly basis"??? Someone has been at the nonsense again.