Comrade Misfit - I've disconnected my home alarm system and deregistered from the Neighborhood Watch.
I've got two Pakistani flags raised in the front yard, one at each corner, and the black flag of ISIS in the center.
The local police, sheriff, FBI, CIA, NSA, Homeland Security, Secret Service and other agencies are all watching my house 24/7.
I've never felt safer and I'm saving $49.95 a month.
1 comment:
If Tovarishch Misfit's experience is anything like mine, they'll watch the burglars break in and cart off his stuff without doing a thing to stop them or even report the burglary in progress.
I had a very nice bike stolen off the back of my car one early-autumn day. To steal it, they had to pry open and destroy the trunk lid and then cut the half-inch wire cable connecting the bike to the car. It must have taken them the best part of an hour.
The car was parked outside the Cambridge Mass court house at the time, with cops going in and out the whole day.
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