Solitary Watch - My name is Scott Andrew Van Bergen, I am serving a 15 year sentence in NY. I just read your article today on isolated confinement. Good Work!! Never Stop!
I truly thought nobody on the outside really understands or cares about the type of condition a person is exposed to. Like myself. I am currently doing 18 months at Southport Corr. Fac. confined to a cell no bigger then ones bathroom at home. 23-24 hours a day. Locked in the cage! Sometimes you don’t get your one hour recreation in a cage smaller then my cage I sleep in. Depends on the CO.
There are times how I think it’s not at all bad doing months on end in Southport, SHU. And then there are times I think, Is it normal for me to think that?? I have lost all communication skills. I mean I have the very little I’ve kept. I don’t even want to talk to any body at many times. I don’t even want to talk to a MHU person [mental health worker].
I feel like a caged in animal. Get treated like an animal. At times I can buy candy bars on Level 3 after being a good boy for several months. I feel like a dog who gets treats every once in a while. I receive my food through a feed-up slot, (like a caged in animal) in old dirty trays that have been around for years. No telling what kind of germs are on the trays. I’ve gotten so paranoid. I switched to kosher food. That way I felt [at] piece with myself knowing my food now comes in packages. I’ve worried CO’s have done GOD knows what to my food.
I sleep next to an old sink toilet combination for crying out loud. What is normal in that? As I sit here and write this letter, it’s a sham because I am really saying to myself, “The SHU life ain’t all that bad!” And yet, what does that tell you? Not one person with a sain mind and level headed will agree with me. I’ve been in and out the SHU all my bid so far. And yet every so often a MHU person walks down the company and not stop at times. Times he or she stops at my cell, he or she asks, “AM I OK?” I say to myself, “OK!?! Ha!” Then I tell her, “Just fine.” That right there will show you my communication skills have gone for south.
1 comment:
This is very sad indeed. Of course, the fellow who wrote this essay is no saint - he did something to get himself incarcerated. That said, one has to wonder. Have we created a society which brings out the worst in people, both the law breakers and the law enforcers? Obviously, the writer of the essay has the power of reason. And one should hope that the "authorities" are also reasonable people. So how has it evolved that we have, and tolerate, such conditions in prisons? How is this improving society? Is that even a goal anymore? Or worse, do we know what improvement in society even is? Look around. Abounding inequality. Wild excess and crushing poverty coexist in defiance of reason. Permanent war. Civilian casualties dismissed as "collateral damage". Disfigured soldiers rewarded with "hero" status in a pathetic attempt to minimize their agony. We are well on our way to perdition, but, by God, we'll make sure the guilty are punished, and punished hard. Brilliant.
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